Taper Worries

by - Friday, October 19, 2012

Taper for me has always been so much more mental than physical.

Physically I know I've put the training in and I have no problem taking a few more rest days, slashing my mileage and giving myself a break. It's well deserved and it will make sure my legs are in prime shape on race day.

Busting out a brand new pair of @mizunorunning wave inspires this morning. #brilliantrun

Even though running has been nonexistent this week because I'm still recovering from the food poisoning, I know that physically I have the strength to run this race.

But mentally, man the demons in my head get loud.

The self doubt and the fear of failure start to creep in and make me question the weeks and weeks of hard training I put in.

Saturday morning long run routine #fitfluential
First long run back in August

I feel severely under prepared. I'm regretting every one of those runs that I didn't do for one reason or another. I'm spazzing the heck out to anyone that will listen, and I'm worried that I won't be able to carb-load sufficiently because I'm still not feeling great.

Really, I'm just scared. I'm scared that I put in all this training, and I'll run a disappointing race and not accomplish any of my goals. I'm scared that some stupid injury will spring up out of no where like my knee in Philly two years ago. I'm scared that I might be the last one of my friends to finish and that I'll let people down.

Almost finished, Almost finished
The infamous crying because my knee hurts so bad picture

I know these are all pretty stupid and irrational fears, but they feel very, very real.

I know I put in the work. I am in better shape now than I was for Philly two years ago. My long runs have been pretty awesome. My times have been right where I want them to be. I know I have it in myself physically to set a new marathon PR. I know I have it in me to rock this race.

20 miles done. Everything hurts. Seriously wonder if I will ever be able to walk again.

But I'm still scared that something will go wrong and I'll fail.

There are so many factors that are out of our control on race day, and I know worrying about them will not do a darn thing to help me, and yet, I can't help it.

This next week is just going to be tough for me mentally. So friends, I welcome any and all distractions. If you see me starring off into space, I'm probably stressing about the race, so come talk to me and snap me out of it.

The race needs to hurry up and get here so I can silence these mental demons once and for all.

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  1. Shut down those taper tantrums, Jess! You rock :) Go have a fro yo :)

  2. Olivia4:29 AM

    Jess, even if you do fail (which you won't!) you are still an inspiration to many, many people, including myself! : )

  3. Esther4:40 AM

    Good luck!!

  4. This was an AMAZING taper post. Taper is the worst, ever. Good luck at MCM!!!

  5. Just find strength in knowing you've done it before so your body is ready. You'll do great, and remember that it's about the journey and not necessarily the destination. Have fun!

  6. Taper time! I hear you. Quiet the demons for a bit. Trust in your training, and get out of your own head. Have a great weekend!

  7. Veronica8:49 AM

    I have been reading your blog for quite some time and you are so inspiring! Just wanted to tell you that you are going to be great! Trust in yourself! You can do it :)

  8. I hate taper week! I always get phantom pains, or I feel like I'm getting a cold or SOMETHING! Hang in there!

  9. I think that happens to all of us! I was alright during taper week, but then my race didn't go well and I was crushed.

    You are going to do great!

  10. Kristina5:59 AM

    I completely know what you are going through. I was just looking over my training schedule from the past 5 weeks and am frustrated with myself for taking 3 rest days one week or doing Bikram yoga when I should have been running. However, I realized that hindsight is 20/20. I know myself, and know there was a reason I opted not to go out those days, I listened to my body. I haven't skipped a long run, I am not injured and the fact I have those two things going for me I am trying to get through this taper for the MCM without going crazy.

  11. It's called "taper madness" for a reason! You'll do great. Try to relax and enjoy the extra rest before race day.